When the lights on the road start to flicker, and the road you are passing by gets darker and colder by night, we at most times felt unsecured, sometimes afraid. And then our fear turns to loneliness and then loneliness to brokenness and then brokenness to hopelessness.
Ever felt that you were the most resilient Christian one day and then the next day, hope is depleting faster than the ice melting on a warmer day? Or the waiting felt like it’s forever that your mind gets crazy with the “no response”?
Last week, I felt that I am getting tired with the “waiting”. I am starting to get bored. I am a very active person and sometimes the wait felt so much that even without moving, it tires me physically, mentally and emotionally. I have been in this situation before but now, it’s much more at stake. My grown-up faith and trust in God are being shaken literally.
I cried to God that night that I am broken, I am afraid and I am starting to feel the heaviness of my hope depleting fast. And God allowed me to cry; He allowed me to express my feelings. I am starting to feel hopeless but I have the audacity that when I express my feelings of hopelessness to my God, He will listen to me. And God did – as I was pouring my heart to Him that I am feeling hopeless and broken and bored, God brought me back to His word to Jeremiah.
Jeremiah 29:11 – 11 For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”
No, I don’t take hold that God will take away these sufferings and this brokenness because God said those words. What I take confidence is that God will be with me at times when I am losing hope and that the grace of God will be sufficient for me to finish the course set upon me. And God is faithful, He will give us what we need when we need it. And when I am broken and hopeless, I know my God will supply all the hope that I need to carry on during this waiting season of my life.
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